pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize