Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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