Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Randomize
