you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize