you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize