I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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