I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
