The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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