You made me cry and you don't even care
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Randomize
