i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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