My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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