man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
