She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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