I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
