margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
