i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.