just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
