God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
