i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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