So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
it glows. i had to have it.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
