were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Farmville is her only friend.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
