i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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