I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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