it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Nobody cheats on THIS.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
