Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize