Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
