I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Randomize
