sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
