At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
