...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
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Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
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I'd cum for enchiladas.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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