God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
