she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
