I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
