i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
