Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize