He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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