Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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