I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Randomize
