Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize
