My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Randomize
