Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
