Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
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was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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