Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
