covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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