i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Randomize
