420 ftw
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
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