The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
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it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
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Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.