At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
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Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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