they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
