I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize